Betrayal

Dear Gabriel

I never used to be jealous of my partner until she betrayed me. In fact I used to enjoy the fact that other women found her attractive. I was sure she would never deceive me. She says she will never do it again but I don’t believe her.

San-Marie

Dear San-Marie

Betrayal is hard and it’s to be expected that this will evoke in you feelings of jealousy and hurt. It would be strange if you didn’t feel this way.

If you feel you could get over these feelings and forgive your partner, then you need to tell her this, and get a similar commitment from her to work on things from her side. I always believe that sitting together as a couple, with a skilled counsellor, can help to unravel what happened and build a new set of rules for a constructive relationship.

Words are easy (haven’t we all said we won’t do something again and then slipped up despite our good intentions?) It’s actions that count. Trust has to be built up over time and only you know if you are willing to give the relationship this time.