Columns: Tag – Lesbian
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A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
About Astrid and her alter ego, Fluffy
Do your inside and your outside match? If they don’t, then you’ll understand why I have to introduce myself twice.
(Outside) If you would all turn your heads this way, that’s it, thank you. Perfect. I’m Astrid – sexy, voluptuous, Mediterranean olive skin, long dark flowing curls that almost cover my nipples. Expressive, dark, wooing eyes and … wait for it … two perfectly reconstructed silicone 34C breastesses.
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Meeting girls
So how the fuck do you meet people in this town? Or any town for that matter! It’s all: ‘Mom, Dad I’m gay!” Then you go striding through that closet door onto pinker pastures and plop … now what? And with whom?
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Coffee girl
I sell frappacinos to restaurants. It pays better than journalism and I’m in London for a good time, not politics.
The girl who serves the coffee at one of my new clients in Chancery Lane takes my breath away (literally. As in, I forget to breathe). She’s definitely gay. I’m never wrong. Except that one time when I was wrong about my first “girlfriend”. (“Just because I let you fuck me doesn’t make me gay,” I think is how she put it.)
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Teach me a lesson
There it was. Perfect. Erect and staring straight at me out of its basket on the floor—
A bunch of old-fashioned wooden rulers – the kind from the fifties when blotchy-skin nuns used them to smack schoolgirls over their little knuckles. Punishment for saying the Lord’s name in vain.
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Soccer
I’ve always loved playing soccer. The last time I played I was 14 (a decade ago). I’ve never played for a team, but my dad used to header all day with me in the garden and I used to play for hours with the garden wall, because the boys wouldn’t let me play with them. They knew I was better.
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
The girl in the copy room
The One’s reaction to the Ruler (read my last column if you don’t understand why a person would have any reaction to a ruler) was okay. And I hate the word okay. Because I use it a lot. It’s mediocre. I hate all things mediocre which is why I hate myself. But I digress. Sorry.
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Pikey Blonde
I promised I would talk about my dating life in my last column, so before I get sidetracked or digress, I’m going to jump right into it.
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
Seventy-thousand lesbians flirting (or not)
You’d think my chances of hooking up, stealing a kiss, or meeting my soul mate would be quadrupled by being around 70 000 lesbians for an entire weekend….
Characters on the Couch
Is it still unfaithful?
Dear Gabriel
I’m a gay woman. I have lived with the same woman for 15 years. I have one question for you: is it still unfaithful if I slept with a man?
A Lipstick Lesbian on the Prowl in London
It happens when you least expect it
“I’m done with this single shit, man! I want a girlfriend. I want to love and be loved,” I ranted to my work colleague, Kay, while we ate lunch at our local caf, which we’ve named La shitty.
“I want someone to miss me when I work late. I have love to give and it’s just sitting inside me and rotting!”
Kay is an intelligent person, but her answer to my tirade was so generic and uninspiring that I nearly jumped across the table to suffocate her with the hood of her coat.
This was on Wednesday, the day it snowed for the first time in October since 1934 and, when I woke up that morning freezing, I was craving someone to talk me into pulling a sickie so we could stay in bed all day and drink tea and have sex.
Kay could sympathise. She’s a single chick in London too. So why then give a pathetic answer like: “It happens when you least expect it”?
Writing Quips and Tips
Romance, Lesbian vs Straight
Both straight and gay Romance writing is about love. Both involve the intensity that we long for in our humdrum lives. They make us believe – that great love is possible, and that Romance is alive and well.
Writing Quips and Tips
Online romantic fiction writing courses
Sign up for one of our online romantic fiction courses. You have until 14 February to take advantage of our special launch prices.
Writing Quips and Tips
Romance – Lesbian vs Straight
Life is a story.We tell stories, not just to entertain and to escape, but as a rehearsal for life. How would we handle this or that? How would we face the trials of our hero or heroine?
Romance novels should provide us with the characters and situations that we can, and choose to, identify with. Lesbian Romance gives gay women the kind of love stories they can be drawn into – that provide them with a “rehearsal for life” in the love stakes.
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